by Pa Rock
Citizen Journalist
There is a new fad that appears to be sweeping through that sewer of filth and self-aggrandizement that is commonly called social media. People are filming themselves licking things and then placing them back on product shelves or with supplies. It's fairly gross and has certain disease and infection implications.
This current crime spree began on July 6th when a young couple, a teenage girl and boy, entered a Walmart in Lufkin, Texas, and paid a visit to the ice cream freezer. There the girl took a gallon of Blue Bell "Tin Roof" ice cream out of the freezer, took off the lid and had herself a big lick, and then, laughing, put it back on the shelf. The boy filmed the incident and later the scene made its way onto the internet where it immediately collected a bazillion "likes" and became an instant sensation.
Texas Governor Greg Abbott, a proponent of Blue Bell ice cream who four years ago was featured prominently in news photos with gallons of the product as he welcomed it back into production in Texas, referred to the licker in a tweet as a "despicable criminal" and warned others not to mess with Texas or Blue Bell Ice Cream!
The despicable criminal could have faced twenty years in prison for tampering with food, but then it was discovered that she is a minor. There is no word yet on how Abbott's Texas juvenile system will deal with the underage lawbreaker.
But the despicable criminal has had her fifteen minutes of fame!
This week there was also another licking incident, this one in a family health clinic in Jacksonville, Florida. There were some medical supplies within reach of patients, along with a sign which read "Please do not touch medical supplies. Thank you." A 30-year-old mother of five then filmed her 10-year-old daughter taking a dental tongue depressor from a container, licking it, and putting it back where she found it. The woman later posted this attack on public health on Snapchat along with a rejoinder saying "Don't tell me how to live my life." Later it was, of course, on Facebook, the primary current of the social media sewer, where more than 60,000 people viewed the video before it was taken down.
The mother has been arrested and is quite upset. She said she did not even realize there was a "licking" challenge on social media.
She goes to court next week where a judge may tell her how to live her life. But the good news is that she, too, has had her fifteen minutes of fame!
Grab it, lick it, put it back - and then post the video! That's high culture in the time of Trump!
Citizen Journalist
There is a new fad that appears to be sweeping through that sewer of filth and self-aggrandizement that is commonly called social media. People are filming themselves licking things and then placing them back on product shelves or with supplies. It's fairly gross and has certain disease and infection implications.
This current crime spree began on July 6th when a young couple, a teenage girl and boy, entered a Walmart in Lufkin, Texas, and paid a visit to the ice cream freezer. There the girl took a gallon of Blue Bell "Tin Roof" ice cream out of the freezer, took off the lid and had herself a big lick, and then, laughing, put it back on the shelf. The boy filmed the incident and later the scene made its way onto the internet where it immediately collected a bazillion "likes" and became an instant sensation.
Texas Governor Greg Abbott, a proponent of Blue Bell ice cream who four years ago was featured prominently in news photos with gallons of the product as he welcomed it back into production in Texas, referred to the licker in a tweet as a "despicable criminal" and warned others not to mess with Texas or Blue Bell Ice Cream!
The despicable criminal could have faced twenty years in prison for tampering with food, but then it was discovered that she is a minor. There is no word yet on how Abbott's Texas juvenile system will deal with the underage lawbreaker.
But the despicable criminal has had her fifteen minutes of fame!
This week there was also another licking incident, this one in a family health clinic in Jacksonville, Florida. There were some medical supplies within reach of patients, along with a sign which read "Please do not touch medical supplies. Thank you." A 30-year-old mother of five then filmed her 10-year-old daughter taking a dental tongue depressor from a container, licking it, and putting it back where she found it. The woman later posted this attack on public health on Snapchat along with a rejoinder saying "Don't tell me how to live my life." Later it was, of course, on Facebook, the primary current of the social media sewer, where more than 60,000 people viewed the video before it was taken down.
The mother has been arrested and is quite upset. She said she did not even realize there was a "licking" challenge on social media.
She goes to court next week where a judge may tell her how to live her life. But the good news is that she, too, has had her fifteen minutes of fame!
Grab it, lick it, put it back - and then post the video! That's high culture in the time of Trump!
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