by Pa Rock
Citizen Journalist
In what smells like a bid to keep profiting from the presidency after he leaves office, Donald Trump this week began floating the idea of turning one of his Florida properties into a presidential retreat similar to Maryland's Camp David. In fact, the current bug that Trump has up his butt is more than just an "idea," he already has lawyers working on the scheme.
Trump has never expressed any love for the rustic and woodsy Camp David, which doesn't even have a golf course. How can a president be truly relaxed and at ease without eighteen holes of exquisitely landscaped beauty and a platoon of flunkies rushing about in pursuit of his golf cart?
Trump sees his "Camp David by the Sea" being housed on his Trump International Golf Club in West Palm Beach, and his lawyers cite the location's benefits as being the major aset. It is two minutes from "President Donald J. Trump International Airport" (formerly Palm Beach International Airport), and future presidents flying in and out of there would keep Trump's name and image in the public consciousness for years, and perhaps generations, to come.
Trump wants this deal so badly that he is even volunteering to pay for the upgrades to the property that would make it suitable for a presidential retreat, bless his heart. (Of course, with the money Trump has raked into his own pockets and those of his family members during his presidency - over two billion dollars and counting - he could afford the turn the entire city of Miami into a presidential retreat!)
But who are we to judge Trump's many fortuitous business decisions and thousands of lucky investments?
And the love and good fortune (income) that this new project would bring to Miami and the Trump family would be untold and monumental, giving wealthy, tanned Floridians one more long and pleasant opportunity to pick their government's pockets before the whole area submerges beneath the rising waters of the Atlantic Ocean.
I only see one minor problem with your grand plan, Dough Boy: who would use it? Certainly none of the living former presidents would ever set foot on one of your projects because for the past decade you have repeatedly degraded and debased each of them. Michelle Obama even skipped Jimmy Carter's funeral just so she wouldn't have to sit next to you. They don't like you - and you will be leaving the presidency under such a cloud of disgrace - and in such a confused state - that the next several presidents, of either party - will avoid even the most casual mention of your name.
You are toxic, Donald. Your "brand" has become little more than a stench. Mama can tie a pork chop around your neck, but the dog still won't play with you - and neither will America's future leaders.
Your days as an aberration in the annals of American history are fast coming to a close. You might want to have Natalie check on the suitcases because it's almost time to start packing. You are going to leave the presidency, Donald, it will happen - and you won't be able to take it with you - not even in the guise of a presidential retreat.
The graffiti on the granite helipad as Marine One lifts your saggy old carcass off the White House lawn for the last time will read "Goodbye and good riddance!"
And the United States of America will heave a mighty sigh of relief!

