by Pa Rock
Many years ago my youngest son, Tim, and I were cruising down the highway when we passed a small, odd-looking truck. "That is a septic tank truck," I explained. "They are used to pump out septic tanks that are full."
Tim looked a little non-plussed before asking, "How do you know that?"
Poor Tim had grown up in the time of sewers. He had never known the joys of digging up lateral lines and cutting out tree roots, or of flushing Rid-X or baker's yeast down the toilet in an attempt to get some chemistry cooking in that big cement container buried in the back yard.
But there are still some places in rural communities that rely on septic tanks, even today, and occasionally one of those funny little trucks can still be spotted running up and down the highways.
Just this week, as a matter of fact, one of those septic tank trucks was pulled over by police in southern Arizona when an alert cop noticed that it's license plate was invalid. Police in that area tend to be very vigilant because of the drug and human trafficking coming into the country from Mexico. They pulled the northbound vehicle over and proceeded to examine it. A closer look revealed that the commercial markings on the vehicle were also invalid. Further examination showed that the truck's excrement tank was indeed full of human waste.
But those intrepid cops knew that something did not smell right.
They soon discovered that the tank full of slushy poop also contained bales of marijuana carefully wrapped in red and orange packaging. The 743 pounds of baled marijuana had a street value of over four hundred thousand dollars! Ouch!
Why am I reminded of Tommy Chong wailing, "Hey man, where's my shit?"
The following day on another Arizona highway, a driver was pulled over for speeding, and the pesky police found over six hundred thousand dollars of methamphetamine concealed beneath a false floor in the vehicle. Speeders transporting meth - it's almost poetic!