Wednesday, April 23, 2014

Kansas East

by Pa Rock
Citizen Journalist

Some daft members of the Missouri Legislature (Republicans, of course) have set their sights on impeaching our Democratic governor - Jeremiah "Jay" Nixon - primarily (as suggested by The Daily Kos) for being a Democrat.  This is the same party, in the same legislature, that saw fit a couple of years ago to desecrate the state capitol building with a bronze bust of Rush Limbaugh's fat head.  (Talk about your impeachable offenses!)

Three Republican state legislators (lets call them Larry, Moe, and Curly - or Larry, Darryl, and Darryl - reader's choice) are drafting complaints outlining the governor's treacheries.  All are laughable.

Larry is upset that that Governor Nixon issued an executive order last year bringing Missouri tax collection procedures in line with federal standards.  The governor decreed that state tax officials were to allow same-sex couples who were married in other states to file joint returns.  That would be all same-sex couples because Missouri has yet to sanction any gay or lesbian unions.  (Hey Larry, read a newspaper or check the Google.  When it comes to gay marriage, it's all over but the shouting - and your side lost.  You're just pissing up a rope, bud.)

Moe (or Darryl) is whining because the governor has not moved fast enough in calling special elections to fill four legislative vacancies.  The law reportedly says the governor should move "without delay" (whatever the hell that means) in calling those elections.  Moe (or Darryl) apparently got a new stopwatch in his Easter basket.

And then there's Curly (or Darryl).  He's off on a gun tangent.   Curly (or Darryl) is furious with the governor because he did not sufficiently punish officials at the state's Department of Public Safety after they provided the Social Security Administration with a list of Missourians who are licensed to carry concealed weapons - 163,000 individuals.  Social Security requested the information from the Highway Patrol in an effort to investigate fraudulent disability claims.

No word on whether Curly (or Darryl) wants the offending officials beheaded or simply caned.

As every gun-toting, disabled hillbilly knows, the gummint its coming to get our guns!  Here's a suggestion in the event the revenuers come for our bullets, too:  melt down that bronze effigy of Rush and turn him into ammo.  That drug-addled pork chop ought to be good for something!

I thought I would miss absurd legislative antics and stunts when I left Arizona.  Obviously, I was wrong!

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