Arizona Votes

by Pa Rock
Citizen Journalist

I telephoned the Elections Office in Maricopa County today to ask if there was a way that I could determine if my mail-in ballot had been received and tallied. After ten minutes of listening to recordings and pressing numbers, I finally reached a human. I told the young man that I had mailed in my ballot three weeks ago. Would there be, I asked, a list of voters who had actually voted posted somewhere after the election so that I could ensure that my ballot had been received? "What is your name, sir?" he asked politely. After I told him, there was a pause for a few minutes, and then he came back on the line and told me that my ballot had been received and counted. Mail-in voting is so easy and so convenient!

Estimates are that one-third of the national electorate may have already voted by election day. Thirty states have some sort of early voting process, and I suspect that they will have fewer problems on election day than those states that cram all of their voters into one twelve-hour period. There certainly should be less waiting and hassle in places where citizens have been allowed to vote early. Who knows, election day might be one of the two or three days a year that we have rain in Arizona!

The Obama campaign began doing television advertising in Arizona today, after most polls moved the race from "solid McBush" to "lean McBush." John McBush has homes in several states, and some of the locals feel that he is more transfixed on life in Washington DC than he is on life in Arizona. Some wags refer to Arizona's Senator Kyl as our "workhorse" and McBush as our "showhorse." So long-story-short, McBush is losing ground in his home state and Obama is going to give him a run for Arizona's ten electoral votes. It's about damned time!

MSNBC reported tonight that McBush has a one-point lead in the polls in Arizona, and that Obama is twelve points ahead of McBush in the state's early voting. My call to Maricopa County today ensures that I am part of that twelve-point lead.

John McBush is up for re-election to the US Senate in two years. If he chooses to run again, Arizona's most popular politician, Governor Janet Napolitano, will send him to Sun City for a long-overdue retirement!

I am hoping for a surprise Obama visit to Arizona over the weekend. It's a shame that he doesn't have time to visit Alaska as well!

Dear Sarah Palin

Dear Sarah Palin,
Tonight you are giving "the speech of your life" in Minnesota, and I am sitting at home in Goodyear, AZ, missing it. Please don't take that as a personal rebuff, because I am currently without television service, and when my radio is on I prefer jazz over politics. And besides, what could possibly be left to learn about you anyway? You and your family have pretty much blanketed the Internet news outlets for two days now - and the Internet is where I turn to stay up-to-the-minute on matters of national and world import.

It was through the Internet that I found out that you know how to field dress a moose. And I know that you like to fish, even if you occasionally forget to buy one of those pesky fishing licenses. I am certain that with talents like those you will be (are?) a wonderful grandmother.

But some of the other stuff that I'm reading about you is not as glowing. In fact, if what I am reading is true, you seem to be rather mean and stupid.

Are you forcing your daughter to marry her "fuckin' redneck" boyfriend? Maybe you should visit a few women's shelters and listen to some of their stories before forcing a political solution on a family situation. Did you really move to take funds away from programs for unwed mothers in Alaska? Why would you do something so cruel to a group of defenseless teen girls who made a mistake - a mistake that can occur in the best of families. And do you truly believe, deep in your heart of hearts, that girls who are impregnated by their fathers, brothers, or savage rapists should be made to bear and give birth to the children of their attackers? If you answered yes to any of those questions, then you are a mean person. If you answered yes to all of those questions, then you are a despicably cruel person. (And I never even got around to discussing your unconscionable views on polar bears!)

That still leaves stupid.

Teaching creationism in public schools as science is stupid beyond measure. Oh, I guess if you want your children to grow up making poor quality meth for a living and crushing beer cans on their foreheads, it probably won't do them any harm. But if you would like for your children to eventually become doctors, scientists, or work in any field where they have to rely on their intellect, then cluttering school curricula with hokum and nonsense will dramatically diminish their potential.

And teaching (preaching) abstinence as the sole source of birth control - how's that working our for you? Stupid, stupid, stupid!

Shame on you and the moose you rode in on!

Pa Rock

Dear Bristol Palin

Dear Bristol Palin,

One can only imagine how much your life has changed in recent days. Just a few short months ago you were enjoying high school and a certain amount of privacy, even as the daughter of a governor. Now, however, you are suddenly thrust into the national fish bowl with millions of strangers clucking about your upbringing, your situation, and your options. How sad for you.

Young people, even younger than you, have babies every day and often make very good parents. I sincerely hope that is the case with you. I am a counselor by trade, and I would like to offer some advice that could serve you well as you enter parenthood. Please take from it what you will.

1. Church can be a very important component of family life, but extreme religious views can also be an impediment to a healthy and happy family. Use common sense and avoid being intolerant of the views and lifestyles of others based on religious doctrine. Love your children, as your parents love you, but don't complicate their lives with unrealistic dogma. As an example, do more than just talk about the virtues of sexual abstinence. We both know that young people routinely engage in sex, so talk to your kids honestly and openly about sex, and be prepared to assist them in procuring birth control in the event that it becomes necessary.

2. The current Governor of Alaska, let's call her "Mom," is so politically rigid that she opposes abortion even in cases of rape and incest. It's a wonderful thing to have well reasoned convictions and to try and live by those convictions. But when we become so hardened and rabid in our views that we can't accommodate good judgment and reason, we have crossed a line and entered the realm of inhumanity. Learn from Mom's mistakes and be flexible. The world isn't them and us - it's just us.

3. Don't let anyone push you into marriage. An unplanned pregnancy is absolutely the worst reason in the world to get married. Levi may be a great guy and he might make a wonderful father, but right now he is awfully immature. He describes himself as being a "fuckin' redneck" and talks about not wanting kids. Give him a few years to mature, and, if he does - and if you still want him - marry him then. Marriage needs to be your decision - make it wisely.

Be strong and be resilient. You will get through this ordeal. May your baby be healthy and may your lives be happy and full of wonder! Stay focused on the needs of your child, and you will be a wonderful parent!

My best to you.

Pa Rock

In Defense of Sarah Palin

by Pa Rock

Well, McBush announced his choice for running mate this morning and spent the rest of the day slapping himself on the back for being so progressive. He thinks that he's found the perfect way to pry loose the wavering Hillary voters. We'll see, Johnny boy, we'll see!

There are things about Ms. Palin that I like, including:

1. She's not Mitt Romney. The country is in dire need of a break from vacuous frat boys who were born with credentials. And isn't it refreshing to know that there are others in the Republican Party besides old white men with money!

2. She is smarter than McBush. Of course, so am I, so are you, and so was 99% of his graduating class at the U.S. Naval Academy!

3. She has been a mayor of a town of 9,000, Governor of Alaska for less than two years, and a proud member of the PTA. Being a mayor of a small town and a governor of a state where the moose population exceeds that of humans really doesn't qualify her for much, but speaking as an old school administrator, I can tell you this with a straight face: if she can navigate the intrigues and politics of a small town PTA, U.S. foreign policy should be a piece of cake!

4. And, as pointed out by a columnist earlier today on Huffington Post, she has what it takes to be the next Dick Cheney! That's high praise, indeed!

Now Ms. Palin, let me give you some heartfelt advice. If John McBush ever calls you a "cu*t" like he publicly referred to his wife, I hope you bitch-slap him into the next life. (And I hope that he wakes up in that next life as the emotionally abused wife of a blowhard!)

Also, I was glad to hear that you were able to get your Wikipedia entry cleaned up a couple of days ago. You're going to need every break that you can get as you try to drag Gramps across the finish line!