Tuesday, February 26, 2019

Pa Rock Is Rolling in It!

by Pa Rock
Money Maker

Being retired and on a modest fixed income, it's a rare day when I actually make some money, but last week the stars aligned and I managed to hit a couple of good licks.

In the first instance I didn't actually bring in any money, but through obstinance and the sheer brute force of my sparkling personality I did save six hundred dollars.  It happened the the local pharmacy.

But first a bit of background.

I am insurance poor.  Being in my early seventies I have Medicare - and I purchased the optional Medicare Part D which covers (poorly - thank you G.W. Bush) prescription drugs.  I also have a complete Blue Cross/Blue Shield insurance plan which I took with me when I left my last job with the U.S. military.  (The BC/BS plan cost me almost exactly as much to maintain as a Medicare supplement would have cost, so I kept it and use that as my supplement.  When Medicare or Medicare Part D hits me with a co-pay, which is almost always, BC/BS will generally cover it.  I don't remember paying any actual medical bills since retiring five years ago, and the most I ever pay on drugs is two or three dollars - and even then I complain - loudly!)

So imagine the reaction that the pharmacy staff got last week when they told me that due to a beginning-of-the-year deductible that I still owed just over $600 on a prescription that I had to have.  It wasn't pretty!  The poor girl at the window assured me that she had ran it by both insurance companies and that the total was correct.  I called my Part D provider from the lobby of the pharmacy, on speaker phone because I don't like the feel of the cell on my ear, and, and after going through fifteen minutes of rigmarole and hearing commercials telling me how great the insurance company was, I got on the line with a lady who assured me that her company had done all it would do, and how if I had no insurance at all, those 90 little pills would have cost me $1,500!   That, of course, made me even madder!)

I cancelled the order for the life-extending drugs and stepped next door to get a shingles shot, and while I was in that office, the original sales clerk stepped in and said that she had just run the order again, for grins I suppose, and that this time it had rung up without a co-pay.

Jackpot!  I grabbed my pills and ran for the door before her computer had time to belch up different ending to the story.

That was on Friday.  The next night I won the lottery - well, $624 anyway.  (A total that would have barely covered the original estimate for the pills - and would have royally pissed me off if I wound up feeling that a pharmaceutical company had stolen my hard-earned lottery winnings!)

The Missouri Lottery has a game called "Lotto" which draws every Wednesday and Saturday nights.  I have bought one Lotto ticket a day for years, and on the drawing nights I have either three or four entries.  Missouri Lotto tickets have two rows of six numbers each.  A person who matches all six numbers on any row wins the grand prize, which is never less than a million dollars.  A person matching three of the six numbers wins a free ticket, and those matching four of six wins a percentage of that week's take - usually around thirty dollars.  Those matching five of six wins a bigger percentage, but I have never worried about that because those odds (for 5 of 6) are something like 15,000 to one.

I win free tickets three or four times a month, and the thrity-something dollar prize no more than once or twice a year.

Last Wednesday I won a free ticket for matching three numbers.  I had told the girl who works the counter where I buy my tickets, that free tickets are inherently unlucky because I had never won anything with one of those.

But that changed early Sunday before daylight when I was checking my Saturday night numbers at the computer.  As I looked at my "free" ticket, I immediately noticed that it had some of the winning numbers.  At first glance I saw three, then four, and then my eyes bugged out as I realized that my free Lotto ticket had matched five of the six numbers.  If I had gotten the other number right - a 6 instead of a 17 - I would have won $1.4 million!

But, hey, hand grenades and horseshoes.  Right?

Later in the morning I took my winning ticket to town and learned that this week's prize for 5 of 6 was $624.  I was one of thirteen people across the entire state to hit 5 of 6, and no one had done better and taken home the grand prize.  I also found out that I would have to mail my ticket in or take it to a state lottery office - in Springfield or Jefferson City - because local retailers could only pay out prizes up to $500.  Then after calling the state lottery office, I learned that winners of any prize of $600 or more also had to fill out a W-9 and pay taxes on their winnings - a fact which more closely aligns with the story of my life.

But that's not a problem because Pa Rock pays his taxes proudly - he is not a freeloading Trump!

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