Thursday, January 29, 2009

A Tale of the Antichrist

by Pa Rock
Religious Muckraker

Late last night I fell onto my comfortable sofa, picked up the remote, and began channel surfing. Soon I came across something on History International that looked promising, a special on the Antichrist. Well, I thought, this should be good for a few grins.

The grins quickly turned into guffaws and belly laughs when the program, obviously several years old, turned to a fundamentalist religious leader for commentary. Their expert on the Antichrist was the Colorado holy man who founded the New Life Mega Church and related businesses, Reverend Ted Haggard. Yup, former meth user and "cured" homosexual Ted Haggard. Who better to speak on the insidious nature of sin and the threat that it poses to God's Chosen?

Brother Ted lost his luster and his flock when a male prostitute outed him in 2006, reporting that the mischievous minister had paid him for man-on-man sex on numerous occasions. Not only did the hooker blow (poor choice of verbs) the whistle on God's gift to Colorado Springs, he also let the world know that the fundamentalist icon who preached the importance of males heading households, had himself taken the position of the woman in their sexcapades. (Brother Ted was a bottom - who'd a thunk it?) The prostitute, who was far more honorable than his client, further admitted that he had been purchasing meth for the fast-talking preacher.

Brother Ted has begged God's forgiveness, fixed things with his wife, given up meth, and been "cured" of his homosexuality. He has recently started on a rehabilitation tour in an effort to reclaim some of his fan base. But wouldn't you know it - just as the big tour bus started to roll, up popped another pesky accuser.

Grant Haas wasn't a prostitute, rather he was a troubled young man who turned to his pastor, Reverend Haggard, for counseling related to his gay tendencies. Ted didn't have to go cruising for sex, the vulnerable young man just walked right into his office. It didn't take the cunning minister long to ensnare the youth in his sexual web. "You know Grant," the solicitous and salivating older man told him, "you can become a man of God and you can have a little bit of fun on the side." Then the lad's spiritual advisor led him to bed.

Grant Haas reported the situation to the leaders of the New Life Church as the other scandal was breaking. Their response was to pay him $179,000 in hush money, also referred to as college expenses. When Mr. Haas recently became aware that Ted Haggard's star was beginning to rise again, he went public with his allegations. He didn't want others to go through the hell that has been his life for the past couple of years.

What impact did Haggard's deplorable actions have on the youth who had turned to him for help? Mr. Haas told CNN that he has attempted suicide four times, is drinking heavily, and is seeing a psychiatrist. Nice work, Brother Ted!

Ted Haggard is a gay man who is deeply troubled by his sexual passions. He has spent most of his life being openly critical and hostile toward people who are able to live their lives honestly. His religion has conflicted his life and made him a moral cripple. Yes, he is a sleazoid who used his money and position of authority for "a little bit of fun on the side." Ted Haggard is also a sad and deplorable character, one more reason to be cautious of those who feel they speak for God. Their "God" may be lying in wait to ready to spring forward at the dropping of their pious pants.

Brother Ted, thou art shameless!


xobekim said...

I spoke to God. She said she wants Brother Ted to confess and repent. She wants him to confess the true nature of his humanity. She wants him to turn away from harming others.

She's totally okay with him opening up a Gay Church. She really just wants Ted to be happy.

God is so nice that way, Yes She Is!

Pa Rock's Ramble said...

Amen, Mike. Amen!