Welcome to the Third World!

by Pa Rock

The Ramble has been down for a few days because I am currently visiting a third world country where there is no cell phone service or wireless Internet - the Missouri Ozarks. The scenic little tourist town of Noel is located in a "green Ozark valley" according to my old school song, but that valley is a hole as far as 21st century technology is concerned. Noel doesn't have a John McCain to strong arm the communications company into giving the town its own tower. (Even getting satellite television is a trick!)

So today I am sitting at a McDonald's in Jane, MO, taking up space and trying to behave like a paying customer so they won't throw me out. Jane is on the Missouri-Arkansas border in the shadow of Bentonville, AR. Bentonville, being the home of Wal-Mart, Jones Truck Lines, and Tyson Foods, has great communications - you betcha they do!

I am in Noel for an early Christmas. My 84-year-old father was the Grand Marshal of Noel's Christmas Parade yesterday, so a lot of the family was able to gather for that big event. My sons, Nick and Tim were there, along with Nick's nine-year-old son, Boone.

My sister, Gail Macy, and he ex, Bob Smith, were also there with three of their grown children, Tiffany Smith and her very nice friend, Justin Smith and his wife, Lisa, and Heidi Pfetcher and her husband Jason. Heidi and Jason's three-year-old daughter, Lauren, was also present. Lauren is a very bright and happy little girl. The Pfetcher's lived in London for a year before Lauren was born, and they are returning for a two-year-stay in April. Now their biggest problem will be figuring out how to keep Uncle Rocky from showing up on their doorstep! (Actually, two friends and I crashed in on them during their last stay in England - and they were wonderful hosts! This time I will stay in a hotel - I promise!)

Justin and Lisa brought their wonderful miniature dachshund, Scooter. (I really miss not having a dog!) Scooter made certain that my face and both ears were clean!

So the big house at 214 South Kingshighway was full and rocking! We also followed the parade down Main Street and made our fair share of noise. Ten years ago I would have known ninety percent of the people in the parade and along the sidelines, but I have been gone too long. All in all, I probably spoke to a dozen people who remembered me or whom I remembered - and the remembering wasn't always mutual!

Last night Gail, Dad, Nick, Tim, Boone, and I went to Neosho for dinner at a Chinese restaurant. Two really nice things happened on that trip. First, as we were leaving we ran into Dianna Afuvai and Janine Kelley, two ladies who used to teach with us at Noel. (Dianna, in fact, had taught with us at Mountain View and then followed us to Noel when I became principal there.) Dianna has retired but still works as a school librarian on a part-time basis. Janine just retired this year. (Janine is the mother of the first girl that I ever remember Nick dating. She also gave us Rusty, our faithful family pooch for many years.)

The other nice thing that happed last night was that Boone and I rode to Neosho and back in the backseat of Gail's car and had a really good conversation. My oldest grandson talked about dinosaurs, planets, Steven King novels, and the things he is doing in school. He is really becoming quite the grownup young man! Boone and his dad have gone on vacation with me the last two summers, and last night we began planning for this year. No hints yet - but it will be the best ever!

I hope that all of Gail's children and my children reproduce with wild abandon because, so far, they have made wonderful parents. Heidi and Jason worship Lauren, yet she shows no signs of being spoiled. She is polite and respectful while remaining very vivacious. Molly and Scott are totally focused on little Sebastian. They are wonderful parents and he is truly a special son and grandson. And I continue to be amazed at the great job Nick does with Boone. Nick always interacts with his son in a calm and pleasant manner, and he encourages him to try new things and to learn. Nick and Boone are the best of friends. I am such a fortunate grandfather!

I am heading back to the Valley of Hell (which is actually quite nice this time of year) on Tuesday. My next posting will probably be from there.

See you then!

2007 Personal Highlights

The year 2007 will pass into the history books later tonight, an event that causes me to reminisce about the year that was. Overall, it was a good twelve months.

In January I joined the Hopkinsville, KY, YMCA, and was faithful to a fitness program there (primarily walking, stationary bicycle, and weights) until I moved West in late September.

I sailed the Caribbean in February with the National Association of Social Workers and MS Magazine. On that voyage I met several prominent feminists including Tyne Daly and Eleanor Smeal, attended a variety of workshops that were focused on feminist issues, and got a good look at Belize, Guatemala, and southern Mexico.

I celebrated my 59th birthday in March and moved to within one year of receiving my first retirement check.

My newest grandson, Sebastian Phoenix Files was born on July 5th. Later that month my son Nick and my other grandson, Boone, joined me in a train trip out West to meet little Sebastian. One highlight of that trip (other than Sebastian!) was a visit to the Grand Canyon.

In September I accepted a job at Luke Air Force Base in Phoenix. It was significant for two reasons: it located me in the same city as Molly, Scott, and Sebastian, and it brought me officially into the federal employment system. Now I am getting to see my grandson on a regular basis, and I am completing requirements for another retirement.

My nephew, Justin Smith, was married in Fayetteville, AR, in September. I flew to Missouri from Kentucky to take my Dad to the wedding. It was really great getting to see all of my sister’s kids at that happy event.

Nick helped move me to Phoenix at the end of September. I doubt that I could have gotten here without him.

I began work at Luke on October 1st. My new co-workers proved to be just as great as those at my last two bases, as well as the good people that I worked with at the Children’s Division in Missouri.

I began blogging in November and am really enjoying the challenge of coming up with interesting things to write about. This project also gives me a place to organize things that I have written over the years, and to present snippets of my personal history. It is a very introspective enterprise.

I made a trip home for the holidays in December and was able to spend a brief amount of time with all of my children and grandchildren. I also learned while there that Tim, my youngest, will be getting married to his girlfriend, Erin, in the near future. That was very good news indeed!

I ended this year by joining a local health club, Lifetime Fitness. After a good initial workout yesterday, I am almost too sore to move today. Old age is such a blessing!

My best to you in 2008!

Pa Rock

Holiday Highlights

Feliz Navidad Amigos,

I have been in Missouri for the past few days celebrating the holidays with family and friends. There was no snow in the Ozarks this holiday season, so I will have to be content with watching it snow on television or in the movies this winter. It definitely won’t happen in Phoenix!

This year’s holiday adventure began as I was trying to get cleared to catch my flight out of Phoenix’s Sky Harbor Airport on the 19th. The good folks at TSA managed to find a reason to collect my shaving cream and toothpaste, even though I thought that I had met all of their insufferable criteria. (The plastic baggie that I had them in was too big, as were the containers. And, for all of you future travelers out of Phoenix, it’s not the amount of toothpaste in the tube; it is the amount that the tube was designed to carry.) Sky Harbor is one place where you do not want to argue with authority figures. Last September their airport security caused the death of a woman when they handcuffed her and left her alone in a locked room. The lady was inebriated, supposedly, and spoke impolitely to the airport cops. After they left her alone, she choked to death trying to squirm out of the handcuffs. Turns out she was a wealthy, well-connected socialite from New York. Whoops! That’s gonna cost them an airplane or two!

My second holiday adventure occurred at Northwest Arkansas Regional Airport, a former cow pasture located just outside of Bentonville, Arkansas, near the little crossroads of Highfill. Highfill International, as it is lovingly referred to by the locals, is a relatively new airport that was put together about a decade ago by the Walton’s, Tyson’s, Hunt’s, and other assorted aristocrats of the area. My Dad arrived there on the 19th to pick me up. There was a parking space right in front of the terminal, which he thought was great, so he parked there and went inside. (My Dad is eighty-three. It takes a great deal of effort for him to walk, and he can hardly hear at all.) When I met him in the airport I heard an overhead announcement describing his truck and saying that the owner needed to get out there immediately. I put on my best smile and went out to resolve the situation. The lady with the ticket pad was already writing and refused to show any holiday spirit. I had her bring her supervisor outside and proceeded to give them some of my holiday spirit. Total price: $20.00 - and I don't regret a single peso! There is no doubt in my mind that Santa Claus will leave chicken poop in her stocking this year!

Adventure number three happened the next day after I had torn apart my Dad’s house searching for my car keys. I had left my car at a park and fly (The Parking Spot) in Phoenix, so I didn’t need them; I just wanted to know where they were. After a long, futile search, I telephoned the Parking Spot and asked Stephanie, the sweetest lady in all of Phoenix, if she would check my car and see if I had left the keys in the ignition. I gave her time to check and then called back. Stephanie replied that my keys were in the ignition, and that my car was still running – thirty hours after I had left it there! A Parking Spot driver was eventually able to get into the car, turn off the engine, and retrieve my keys. I will be nominating myself for the Darwin Award this year!

My final adventure occurred on the night of the 22nd as I was trying to leave. Winter storms were flirting with the Ozarks, and I made a decision to go to the airport the night before my 5:30 a.m. scheduled departure. I didn’t want to take the chance of having my Dad get out in bad weather. A friend took me to Highfill and I spent the entire night listening to taped TSA warnings about all kinds of ways those sneaky terrorists might bring their evil to Arkansas.

Three of my New Year’s resolutions are to always use the Parking Spot in Phoenix when I fly, always be polite to the Gestapo at Sky Harbor, and never fly into or out of Northwest Arkansas Regional Airport. Of course, there is a good chance that my next trip home will be by Greyhound, or in my amazing little car that can idle for thirty hours!

There were many happy times woven into this holiday. I saw all three of my children and both of my grandchildren. Tim, my youngest, informed us that he is engaged to his longtime girlfriend, Erin, which is great because we all love Erin! Boone, my oldest grandson, announced that he had given two girls diamond rings for Christmas. He bought them at the dollar store. I saw my sister, Gail, and two of her kids, Tiffany and Justin, and Justin’s wife, Lisa. I had lunch with some of my old co-workers, and ran into some others at the county courthouse. And I was able to visit with old friends Mertie Harmon and James and Patti Carroll. A lot happened in just a few short days! Now I will relax and spend the rest of the holidays with a few other good friends - both paperback and hardbound!

May '08 bring Peace to us all!

Pa Rock