Elvis Is Alive!

  

(Editor's Note:    In today's posting Ranger Bob recalls an interesting one-sided conversation that he recently overheard at the barber shop, and he uses it to reflect on the nature and proliferation of conspiracy theories.)

Elvis Is Alive!

by Bob Randall

I heard this at the barbershop this week. The guy who was having his hair cut in the chair next to mine said so. He started talking about it as soon as the Barber asked him, "what's new with you?"  He didn't stop talking about Elvis until he was walking out the door. It must be true.

He was more of an agnostic than a true believer. He commented that there was no way to know if that was true. He said that it was his wife who was absolutely convinced that Elvis was still alive. He talked about many other people who also believed it. Priscilla Presley several years back answered a reporter's question about what Elvis would be doing now if he were alive. She said that he would be a preacher. There's a guy down in Arkansas named Preacher Bob who's the right height, the right age, has the right voice (or at least he is good at mimicking), he has a little scar on his cheek where Elvis had his scar from chicken pox, he has the same gap in his teeth as Elvis, and he tells people that he is not who they think he is. I'm not sure what that means but I'm guessing that this guy’s wife thinks it means that he's not really Preacher Bob, he is really Elvis. It could mean the opposite, but the lack of clarity surely helps his image and the haul when they pass the collection plate. Elvis apparently made a cameo appearance in the movie "Home Alone", and there are photos of him getting on a helicopter a few hours after his death. The sweat on Elvis’ body as he lay in his casket really adds to this body of proof.

This has some similarities to many of the conspiracy theories that are currently prevalent. People use their bias to make choices. They search for ideas that will confirm what they want to believe, and they discard evidence to the contrary. This is a logical fallacy called confirmation bias. They use other logical fallacies in their arguments and thought processes such as the straw man fallacy, the false equivalence, ad hominem attacks, circular arguments, and others. Heck, you can even convince some people that there is a pizza parlor in New York City that has a basement where Hillary Clinton holds children as sex slaves or something like that. 

Now I would be embarrassed to even tell people that my wife believs this. I can't imagine why the guy kept going on and on, but I was having fun silently ridiculing both of them in my mind. I’m fairly sure that I heard the barber sigh when the customer finally walked out the door.  I, for one, am less agnostic and more atheist about this. I don't think Elvis was ever alive. Well, what do I know?