The Burger Report

by Pa Rock
Citizen Journalist


Consumer Reports is out with its much anticipated hamburger rankings.  The magazine asked nearly thirty thousand people nationwide to rate the burgers of eighteen fast food joints.  In-N-Out Burgers and Five Guys Burgers tied for first place in the burger wars, and America's favorite (at least we thought it was), McDonald's, came in dead last!

I've written about burgers in this space before.  They have long been a favorite food of mine, and now, being on Okinawa where the locals make horrible burgers, I get these monumental cravings for a taste of home.  Burgers fit the American psyche because they are easy to hold onto and can be eaten on the fly.   They can also be personalized with condiments and veggies to the point that they could pass for high art.  Give me mine with mustard, pickle, and tomato, please - and perhaps a touch of onion if I am having one of those days.  (Jimmy Buffett likes his Cheeseburger in Paradise with lettuce and tomato, Heinz 57 and French fried potatoes!)

No, Margaritaville did not make the list, but they sell a great burger!

In-N-Out burgers are delicious, but they are available only in a few states in the American West.  I have never even heard of Five Guys before, but now have them on my bucket list.  However, of the others ranked by the readers of Consumer Reports,  I am too familiar with several.  Whataburger, my personal favorite, came in at a respectable number seven, well ahead of Harold and Kumar's late night munchable treat, White Castle, which placed at eleven.  Wendy's and Sonic, also two of my favorites, held down spots twelve and thirteen.  The two that just barely beat out McDonald's  at the bottom of the list were Burger King and Jack in the Box.

America has spoken, and Ronald McDonald could not have liked what he has heard!

(Complete list in order:  In-N-Out, Five Guys, Fuddruckers, Burgerville, Back Yard Burgers, Culver's Frozen Yogurt, Whataburger, Hardees, Carl's Jr, Checkers Drive-In, White Castle, Wendy's, Sonic, A&W, Krystal, Burger King, Jack in the Box, and McDonald's.)