Wednesday, August 22, 2012

The GOP is Ripe with Embarrassment

by Pa Rock
Citizen Journalist

The GOP is claiming to be mighty embarrassed by poor Todd Akin, the blundering senatorial candidate from Missouri who made statements which implied that some rape was not legitimate (you know, like the ones where women ask for it), and that "legitimate rape" rarely results in pregnancy because women's bodies can somehow keep from getting pregnant - unless they were enjoying the rape, of course, and then their bodies make fetuses.

I heartily acknowledge that Todd Akin is an embarrassment to the human species - but does that necessarily make him an embarrassment to the Republican Party?   Basically he just said what many others in the party have either already said, or affirmed with their years of silence on the subject.  Paul Ryan, the potential vice-presidential candidate had earlier supported only one exception for abortion - and that was in cases of "forcible" rape.  Those who got pregnant through un-forced rape could bear their shame for nine long months and then spend the rest of their lives caring for the child of their rapist.

Sweet, Paul.  Sweet.

Arizona Governor Jan Brewer, a teabagger Republican and ever the intellectual, said that Akin's statement was "a little bit outrageous," but did not call for him to drop out of the race.   Brewer would certainly qualify as an embarrassment to her party, if her party had any shame.

And Mitt Romney has been all over the place on the subject of abortions, from his past support and endorsement of Planned Parenthood to complete denial of any abortion rights.   After Akin's grotesque remark, Mitt had to sleep on it overnight while his campaign monkeys did some quick sensing of the public mood.  When he awoke, Mitt was aghast at what Todd Akin had said and encouraged him to quit the senate race.

The old joke about 'you know he's lying if his lips are moving' has never fit anyone as well as it does Romney.  Mitt may not be an embarrassment to the GOP, but he would have damned sure been an embarrassment to his father.

The Republican Platform, the plan on which the candidates run (in theory) has its standard anti-abortion plank - which does not mention any exceptions such as for rape or incest.  That should embarrass the party, but again, the party has no shame.  Some wags have taken to calling the anti-abortion plank, the one the party trots out every four years,  "the Akin Plank" because it is essentially the view that Todd Akin has always espoused - and it is the position that many Republicans are very comfortable in supporting.  (They are, however, very aggrieved that he brought so much public attention to their extreme and official position.)

But back to the idea of Republicans being embarrassed -  how can a party that invites Sheriff Joe Arpaio to speak at its national convention not be embarrassed?  That's right, Geriatric Joe will be speaking live to the convention from an elephant compound at the Tampa Zoo.  Seriously.  Of course, Hurricane Isaac may be blowing into town about the same time, so maybe those fidgety elephants will...but I digress.

Congratulations to all of the hookers in-and-around Tampa, both male and female.  You should be rolling in the dough next week as the ever-pious members of God's Own Party (the GOP) hit the streets!    Teach those greedy bastards what capitalism is all about!   

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