Adios, Texas!

by Pa Rock
Amused Spectator

Chuck Norris, who has probably been kicked in the head too many times to be responsible for anything he says, stated on Glen Beck's radio show last week that he may just run for President...of Texas! A day or two later, after the idea gained some traction with the Fox News morons, he expanded his notion into a column for The World Net Daily. His disjointed analysis of the problems facing the world lend credence to my "kicked in the head" theory, but what is also readily apparent is that he is rampantly paranoid of President Obama and his liberal agenda.

But not to worry, if push comes to shove, Texas will secede and Chuck will lead them to glory, or Albuquerque, or somewhere. In his rant about the unhappy state that he thinks the nation is in, he references "thousands of cells" that he claims stand ready to rise up. And while the Chuckster doesn't call for a national revolution, he does discuss, in a seemingly serious manner, the potential secession of Texas.

Well, with the exceptions of Austin, El Paso, and select parts of San Antonio, that dog might hunt. President Norris could strap on his six-guns, rip open his shirt, pin a yellow rose to his right nipple, place his hand on the Bible, and swear to God that he will faithfully lead his Republic back into the glory days of the nineteenth century.

In a related story, Homeland Security announced this week that there are now one million names on the no-fly list. The actual alleged terrorists may number only around four hundred thousand, but many apparently have multiple aliases - hence the one million names. What do you want to bet that the person who is openly advocating for the dismemberment of the nation - the future President of Texas - is not on the list?