Hit the Road, Flo!

 

by Pa Rock

Citizen Journalist

As a self-taught family researcher who has been slowly learning the skills involved in genealogy for over forty years, I have become familiar with all types of records and the ways they help reveal aspects of people's lives which otherwise might be lost in the dust of time.  One of my favorite types of records  (and one that I always hope to find when I begin tracking down an ancestor) is some form of an obituary - because obituaries reveal so much about a person, statistical as well as personal.

Obituaries are usually written by personnel at the funeral home handing the final arrangements, and published on the funeral home's website and often in a local newspaper.    Relatives are consulted for information that goes in the obituaries, and sometimes relatives will write the brief biographies themselves.  (I wrote the obituaries for both of my parents.) Occasionally people will even prepare their own obituaries prior to their deaths to highlight what they want remembered about their lives.

Obituaries contain facts about the lives of the deceased which give important clues to researchers about where to look for further information - things such as dates and places of birth, parents' names, siblings' names (and sometimes places of residence), names of children and grandchildren, educational backgrounds, occupations, and even things like hobbies and special interests.  Obituaries tend to offer a more personal glimpse of a person's life than other records like birth and death certificates or census records,  With obituaries you are far more likely to get a sense of who the person really was.

The following very brief obituary has been bouncing around the internet this week, and though it is succinct, it is also quite revealing.  It was penned by the adult daughter of the deceased who had not seen her mother in more than a decade prior to the woman's death, and did not learn of her death until months after it happened.  The daughter, who showed her brutal assessment of her mother to relatives prior to submitting it for publication, said she wrote the obituary with sarcasm and relief, but that "it's real."

Christina's obituary for her mother, Florence, was published in a newspaper in the mother's home state and later picked up a national magazine.  It was just four sentences long, but had a lot to say:

"Florence ______ died without family by her side due to burnt bridges and a wake of destruction left in her path,  Florence did not want an obituary or anyone including family to know she died.  That's because even in death she wanted those she terrorized to still be living in fear and looking over their shoulders.  So, this isn't so much an obituary but more of a public service announcement."

There is an old saying that goes:  "Be careful how you treat your children because they are the ones who will be choosing your nursing home."  It would be prudent to note that they may also be the ones writing your obituary!

Happy trails!