Bannon in the Slammer

 

by Pa Rock

Citizen Journalist

One of the great villains of the Trump era was finally force-fed his just desserts yesterday when when a prison door in Danbury, Connecticut, slammed shut behind his sorry behind.   Steve Bannon, the former presidential adviser and current political podcaster, finally, and very reluctantly, entered FCI Danbury, a minimum security federal prison that has housed other social miscreants like Rev. Sung Myung Moon and hotelier Leona Helmsley.   Bannon began serving a four-month sentence over two misdemeanor counts of contempt of Congress because he had refused to appear before Congress and testify when subpoenaed.  

Bannon fought valiantly to avoid paying for his crimes, but he ran out of legal options last Friday when the US Supreme Court refused to delay his sentence while he exhausts his appeals over the conviction.

Too bad, so sad.  If he could have only held on a few more months until his fat, incontinent friend returned to the White House, surely he would have been granted a pardon.   Why the heck didn't his buddy issue some sort of preemptive pardon back when he was in the White House the first time?  Obviously he knew that his loyal rodent would never rat him out.  The lack of a preemptive pardon was an oversight of cataclysmic consequence!

(Fortunately Bannon did get a presidential pardon from Trump over his involvement in the "We Build the Wall" ripoff that sent his partners-in-crime to prison.  Small mercies.)

Marjorie Taylor Greene showed up in Danbury yesterday to see Bannon off as he entered into incarceration.  Perhaps he will be able to amuse himself with thoughts of her "bleach-blonde, bad-built, butch body" as he lies on his bunk listening fearfully for Bubba's stealthy stroll past his blessedly-barred-and-locked cell door.

Enjoy your free government housing, Steve-O, even if it is only temporary, and, oh yes, HAPPY INDEPENDENCE DAY!

Ain't freedom grand!