by Pa Rock
Poetry Appreciator
Yesterday I ventured out to my local grocery store, my first visit there in over a month. The grocery shopping routine had changed markedly in my absence.
A store employee was stationed outside of the main door controlling foot traffic into the building. She kept track of the number of people who were inside - and she also wiped down returned carts with disinfectant and handed them to the new shoppers along with a warning to return carts to her and not pass them along to other customers. As I entered the store with my clean cart, I heard her stop the next shopper and tell him that he had to wait until I was further down the first aisle before he could enter.
The shopping aisles were marked with directional arrows - an improvement that I hope they keep even after the pandemic passes - along with distance markers indicating how far apart shoppers should stay from one another - another much-needed foot-traffic improvement, IMHO.
I dressed for the occasion: my big, floppy mowing hat, long jeans instead of the shorts that I wear at home, and even a light jacket - although it was a beautiful. spring afternoon. I also had my face mask on. All of the store employees were wearing face masks, but most of the mouth-breathing customers followed the example of Donald Trump - and Mike Pence when he was at the Mayo - and declined the opportunity to respect the safety of themselves and others.
I followed a family through the store who had no interest whatsoever in all of the pandemic paranoia. A father, mother, and teenage son, all dressed in shorts and not wearing face masks were just ahead of me during much of the shopping process. Between the three of them they managed to touch most of the merchandise in the store, and when they got to the unwrapped, fresh tomatoes, they literally handled every tomato in the bin. I wanted some tomatoes. I wanted some tomatoes really, really badly - but after watching the Von Trumps handle every luscious tomato in the store, I passed on buying any for myself.
Later in the day I walked to the local park and sat at a shady picnic table - by myself - and telephoned a friend in Phoenix to see how she was holding up. During the conversation I mentioned the family that I had observed handling the tomatoes in the grocery store, and my friend shared a couple of similar stories out of Phoenix. We wondered together whether it was some sort of protest thing by people who were angry at all of the new rules brought about by the pandemic - or was it just plain old garden variety ignorance.
Obviously not everyone gets the message, and some hear it but refuse to change their behaviors because of some other overarching belief - or spite, but overall a lot of people are hearing and adapting to our changing times. We are adopting new behaviors to accommodate this crisis, and many of those behaviors will extend well into life beyond the crisis. I used to take grocery shopping for granted, but I suspect that from now on I will be far more observant and cautious as I navigate the aisles and fill my cart.
George Hunter refers to himself as a "rhymer" instead of a poet, but regardless of whatever label he chooses to affix to himself, his words bring insight and a fair amount of humor into the trials of daily life. Here is his take on grocery shopping - back in the days before the pandemic. Enjoy.
Grocery Shopping
by George Hunter
Hidey Hi, Hidey Ho!
I need to go to the grocery sto.
To get some food for my old hound dog
He eats like a poor starved Hampshire hog.
Also get a treat for my pussycat, Miss Pip
Who longs for a taste of fresh catnip.
And some bacon and fresh eggs for myself
And some canned goods for the pantry shelf.
A loaf of that tasty raisin bread
To cover with luscious strawberry spread.
I'll tell you what I really wish
Some clams and oysters and other fish.
Also some booze and a pack of Miller Lite
Enough to last me through the night.
So I went to the nearest SaveMart
And loaded all that stuff into my cart.
Went to the counter to check it out
Cost seventy-five dollars without a doubt.
Wrote a rubber check, with a straight face
Then in double-time I was outta that place.
A few hours later cops came to my door
Said we know you cheated that grocery store.
Your latex check bounced up to the ceiling
You have no grounds for an appealing
And we won't put up with double dealing.
So now I'm in the local clink
Didn't even have time to finish my drink.
The moral of this story is not so funny
"Don't go shopping when short of money."
But I was hungry and thirsty and couldn't wait
Such is the fickle finger of fate.
Poetry Appreciator
Yesterday I ventured out to my local grocery store, my first visit there in over a month. The grocery shopping routine had changed markedly in my absence.
A store employee was stationed outside of the main door controlling foot traffic into the building. She kept track of the number of people who were inside - and she also wiped down returned carts with disinfectant and handed them to the new shoppers along with a warning to return carts to her and not pass them along to other customers. As I entered the store with my clean cart, I heard her stop the next shopper and tell him that he had to wait until I was further down the first aisle before he could enter.
The shopping aisles were marked with directional arrows - an improvement that I hope they keep even after the pandemic passes - along with distance markers indicating how far apart shoppers should stay from one another - another much-needed foot-traffic improvement, IMHO.
I dressed for the occasion: my big, floppy mowing hat, long jeans instead of the shorts that I wear at home, and even a light jacket - although it was a beautiful. spring afternoon. I also had my face mask on. All of the store employees were wearing face masks, but most of the mouth-breathing customers followed the example of Donald Trump - and Mike Pence when he was at the Mayo - and declined the opportunity to respect the safety of themselves and others.
I followed a family through the store who had no interest whatsoever in all of the pandemic paranoia. A father, mother, and teenage son, all dressed in shorts and not wearing face masks were just ahead of me during much of the shopping process. Between the three of them they managed to touch most of the merchandise in the store, and when they got to the unwrapped, fresh tomatoes, they literally handled every tomato in the bin. I wanted some tomatoes. I wanted some tomatoes really, really badly - but after watching the Von Trumps handle every luscious tomato in the store, I passed on buying any for myself.
Later in the day I walked to the local park and sat at a shady picnic table - by myself - and telephoned a friend in Phoenix to see how she was holding up. During the conversation I mentioned the family that I had observed handling the tomatoes in the grocery store, and my friend shared a couple of similar stories out of Phoenix. We wondered together whether it was some sort of protest thing by people who were angry at all of the new rules brought about by the pandemic - or was it just plain old garden variety ignorance.
Obviously not everyone gets the message, and some hear it but refuse to change their behaviors because of some other overarching belief - or spite, but overall a lot of people are hearing and adapting to our changing times. We are adopting new behaviors to accommodate this crisis, and many of those behaviors will extend well into life beyond the crisis. I used to take grocery shopping for granted, but I suspect that from now on I will be far more observant and cautious as I navigate the aisles and fill my cart.
George Hunter refers to himself as a "rhymer" instead of a poet, but regardless of whatever label he chooses to affix to himself, his words bring insight and a fair amount of humor into the trials of daily life. Here is his take on grocery shopping - back in the days before the pandemic. Enjoy.
Grocery Shopping
by George Hunter
Hidey Hi, Hidey Ho!
I need to go to the grocery sto.
To get some food for my old hound dog
He eats like a poor starved Hampshire hog.
Also get a treat for my pussycat, Miss Pip
Who longs for a taste of fresh catnip.
And some bacon and fresh eggs for myself
And some canned goods for the pantry shelf.
A loaf of that tasty raisin bread
To cover with luscious strawberry spread.
I'll tell you what I really wish
Some clams and oysters and other fish.
Also some booze and a pack of Miller Lite
Enough to last me through the night.
So I went to the nearest SaveMart
And loaded all that stuff into my cart.
Went to the counter to check it out
Cost seventy-five dollars without a doubt.
Wrote a rubber check, with a straight face
Then in double-time I was outta that place.
A few hours later cops came to my door
Said we know you cheated that grocery store.
Your latex check bounced up to the ceiling
You have no grounds for an appealing
And we won't put up with double dealing.
So now I'm in the local clink
Didn't even have time to finish my drink.
The moral of this story is not so funny
"Don't go shopping when short of money."
But I was hungry and thirsty and couldn't wait
Such is the fickle finger of fate.
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