A Little Girl from Little Rock

by Pa Rock
Citizen Journalist

Chelsea Clinton grew up in a circus, so it only seems fitting that she also gets married in one.

The television celebrity shows are all abuzz (agog?) with stories about Chelsea's wedding this weekend on the banks of the Hudson River in a posh portion of New York state. She is being married at a place called Astor Courts, whose very name reeks of old money - lots and lots of old money. That's a nice touch, because the Arkansas hillbillies, er...uh...Clintons, are definitely new money.

New money - like within the last decade new. Some reports state that Bill piled up a hefty $109 million in speaking fees since leaving the White House ten years ago.

So Chelsea's parents have the where-with-all to throw a really swell wedding for their princess when she marries Marc Mezvinsky on Saturday. Estimates of the total cost range from two to five million dollars. Not too shabby of a sendoff for a curly-headed little girl from Little Rock!

Of course, I guess that when invitations run more than a hundred dollars each, and table settings are over two hundred dollars a piece, the whole shindig can get awfully pricey awfully quickly. (They did manage to get the air-conditioned tents at a steal - a meager six hundred grand!) And then there is the extra cash that goes into closing down air space around the event, and paying good overtime to platoons of local cops. (I wouldn't want to imagine what could happen to some modern day Huck Finn who chose that particular Saturday to go floating down the Hudson on a homemade raft!)

But safety is of primary importance - Oprah is coming for pete's sake, and so is Barbra Streisand, and Spielberg, and Ted Turner. Somehow even President Obama managed to finagle an invitation!

What a shame the general public will be barred from this glorious event. They should at least be let in far enough to see the clown cars swerving through the elephant poop!

Best wishes, Chelsea and Mark. May your life together be one of simplicity and much happiness!